It has been absolutely freezing in upstate NY these last few days. Because of these ridiculous temperatures I bundled myself up and drove my car directly to the gym last night with another one of my running peeps. We tried to make plans to explore the SUNY Albany tunnel system so we could avoid the treadmill, but with colleges still being out on holiday break, there was rumor that the tunnels were locked up pretty tight, so we made our way to the YMCA instead. For now… I will explore the tunnels soon.
As I pulled into the parking lot, it dawned on me that it was the second day of the new year. The parking lot was totally jammed with cars. Right right, we all have new years resolutions to uphold and we’ve just eaten a lot of food over the holidays, so let’s get thee to the local gym. Please don’t get me wrong, I was new once too, but man oh man when the gym is so crowded it’s slightly stressful. Fortunately, the treadmills were not all taken. Thank you to all of the folks who were walking on the track instead of treadmills.
My plan was to run six miles. Oh how I loathe the treadmill. As always, I run a warm up mile and then start playing with the speed buttons a quarter of a mile at a time . At mile three I was certain that there was no way that I would ever make it to six. The sheer boredom of running in place was killing me. But, I dug deep and remembered something. I remembered that I made a deal with myself that this year, I won’t let myself down. I will make the commitment to believe in me, to believe in my own ability and to believe in the power that I can finish anything I start. So I had a quick (mostly self talk) conversation that went something like this:
Boring. (Treadmill is boring.)
I have a goal.
Believe in Me. I’m coming.
That’s the quick version of how I have to remind myself that while I’m bored at times, if I don’t put the work in, I won’t reach my goals. And if anyone needs to believe in me, it is ME. I have to believe that despite the altitude at IMLT, I can finish that race. If I don’t believe that, why bother showing up? I have to believe that I can run 31 miles. Otherwise, why bother signing up for a 50k? I have to believe that I can do anything that I decide to do.
If I don’t believe in me what kind of person, friend, Mom am I? If I don’t believe in me, how in the world can I expect anyone else to? So I believed last night. I know it wasn’t for anything big as it was only a six-mile run, but to me it signifies the beginning of a new journey and hopefully this journey will lead me to my goals.